Monday, April 16, 2007

omen: Day After Tomorrow

i know i've been writing more personal insights about life and less on the omens that i encounter.

but, this time.
i have an Omen encounter.

New York was deluged by rain for 30 hours straight.
gusty winds, flooding and complete darkness.
quite scary.

made even scarier with the film i was watching.
that climate apocalyptic film called Day After Tomorrow.
which i found surprisingly entertaining.

i don't know why.
but i have a thing for films of an epic and global scale...
which most of the time had an apocalyptic flavor.

there was one scene showing the leading lady risking her life to rescue a mother and daughter pair (complete strangers to her) from being flooded in a door-locked cab.

this was the omen part to me.
i think the world will be better if people performed more acts of kindness.
even just small ones.

then i started pondering on it deeper.
maybe the world is populated by small acts of kindness.
we just do not know about it.
since the news media is convinced that negative topics do better in the ratings.

i've helped my share of strangers here in NY.
and i have, in turn, helped by them.

so if someone tells you of a dream of his,
hope you have some time to spare to check if you can assist him fulfill it.
because there is no greater trophy than a person who achieved his True Dream, partly because of you... adding one more positive person on this planet.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

finding love

i am not here to tell you how to find it.
but if you are searching for it or wish to understand what healthy love is all about...
read The Path to Love by Deepak Chopra.
he definitely can explain it better than me.

after watching so much television on this storm-ridden Sunday,
i realized that perhaps the reason people go after the most handsome or beautiful individuals in their search for love was because they make good trophies or arm candy.

there is nothing better for your ego than introducing a hot guy or girl to your friends as your current flame.

because by doing so, it elevates your worth.

i am an idealist.
i definitely want the best for myself.
best job.
best business.
best significant other.

i do not like selling myself short.

but then i think about a significant other i currently have in my life who goes against the grain of who i am usually attracted to.

this person has a good heart with values that jive with mine.

let me tell you, finding that chemistry is better than any trophy.

and besides, human beings are not trophies.
they have feelings too.
so it is highly unfair to date someone because he or she looks good on you.
that person equally deserves someone who likes him for the real and right reasons.

dreaming while the bills are piling up

so i emailed my younger brother of a great website idea.
it was a concept with so much uniqueness and potential.

he said he wanted to do it but unfortunately he does not have enough energy left after his work to be in the mood to do it.

i told him that it was no problem.
i was just sharing the idea with him, knowing that the concept was something close to his heart and something that will definitely make him happy (as it was related to his passion / hobby in life).

here is an excerpt from the email reply i sent him:

as for work,
i know it is hard.
and, trust me, i can relate.

the key things to remember are the following:

1) work is but a means to an END ... you need to know and be aware of that Future Goal as to why you are working:
ex) saving for school, saving for the capital for a business, saving to buy something, saving for a trip to Europe
- bottom line, you must know why you are earning a salary and know how money will benefit you or in the future

2) you are obliged to take care of yourself emotionally and spiritually...
ex) after work, you must do something that GENUINELY makes you happy
- most of them take the form of rituals such as drinking your favorite cup of coffee after work, i go to my favorite fashion stores or bookstores after work

3) on the side, you MUST simultaneously work on your TRUE dream
- you can always argue that you do not have either enough time, enough energy left after work, or enough money to pursue this dream
- while these are real conditions, the key is to start taking small and FREE steps to work towards a future goal
ex) i do not have capital yet to launch a fashion line... but after work, i surf for websites that inspire me about fashion advertising, i google search looking for tailors to sew my samples, i surf the fashion collections of my favorite designers, etc
ex) i dream of buying a condo in manila ... once i started surfing locations in manila, economy of manila, etc.

4) start a dream map or collage:
- after work, go through magazines or websites containing things you DREAM about: either want to buy or want to accomplish
- i realized that most of the pictures i posted on my apartment walls came true in my life
- it inspires you to achieve and looking at one's dreams reminds you why you are working, what your money will be doing for you and how it can be linked to your happiness

sugar or salt?

one of my lowest points in my life in New York had something to do with poverty.
i believe it was my second year here and i was at a dead-end job.
working hard at a full-time job but still did not have enough left after bills.

i remember one weekend...
all i had was a cup of coffee and some food from a relative.

the coffee needed sugar.
and the food needed salt.

and both condiments were out.
and after counting my coins, i had enough money left to buy just one of the two from a nearby deli.

so i had to choose between buying sugar or buying salt.

sugar and salt are not things one usually struggle with.
i am sure we always take them for granted.

now that i have enough money in my life.
and my financial future is finally increasingly positive and accumulating...
i am proud of the fact that i continue to value and feel grateful for everything i currently have, no matter how basic.

so whenever i see sugar or salt on a restaurant table,
i am reminded of my journey,
i am reminded of my perseverance,
i am reminded of the capacity of every human being to turn the bleakest of life situations into something significantly better.

i am proof of that.

Friday, April 6, 2007

dreamers who only dream

i am severely disappointed that a friend of mine simply continues to dream but not do anything to achieve it.

this person complains that his day job is no longer fulfilling.

but when given a chance to do something he is passionate about,
i was shocked to know that several weeks had passed and not even the first step was accomplished.

so if this persons complains to me again the he is no longer happy with his job...
i will tell him he deserves his suffering.
and to refrain from whining to me from now on.

people dream all the time.
but unless you carry that dream into the Waking World, that dream remains simply a dream.

i seriously cannot believe it.
i even did the dirty work to help this person start.
and he still was lazy enough to simply build upon what was already started for him.

he does not deserve his dream.
his Dream should abandon him.
and go towards the more proactive and ambitious ones.

Thursday, April 5, 2007

is it integrity?

so, i had a big fight with my best friend last night.
the thing with very good friends is that both tend to be very comfortable with who they really are.
no more need to use the polite and rehearsed personas we use in everyday life.

i have a big pet peeve with people.
i hate repeating myself.
because my logical brain does and explains things so methodically, think in bullet form on Microsoft Word, severely itemized like a Thesis Outline.
simply put, i say it in Step 1, Sub a), Sub b) , etc.

so my friend did not get it.
so i had to explain it again.
seriously, it was not that hard.
just two forms.
one to be signed by you.
one to be signed by the lawyer.

he still did not get it.
so i repeated it for the Third Time.
i asked if he got it this time.
he said Yes.

10 seconds after,
he asked how many forms again were we talking about.

that is when i blew up.

i find it extremely rude when people do not listen intently.
not only that, this repetition has happened before.
and a fight always follows that.

so, in the past,
i set a fair Ultimatum.
because i won't change.
because he won't change.
then we either:
1) find a compromise to make the friendship work.
2) we give it up completely.

he violated the compromise on his part.

so i asked him again.
i said:
i cannot do this.
and fight with you.
and get upset.
and be angry every time we talk.

so, i posed the question again:
while it is unfair to ask people to change,
i said that it is better to dissolve this friendship because it causes me anger and negativity.
that it is better if he gets out.
i will miss the good times and the good that our friendship is equally capable of.
but this repetition is extremely rude to me.

so the question was: how important is this friendship to you?
if it is, he must try harder and is only allowed two repetitions. that's it.
if he cannot do it, then next time, it is over.

sounds harsh, i know.
but my life is too important to waste on being angry.
and i do not expect to get along with everyone.

as a good quote once said:
those who do not mind, matter.
those who mind, do not really matter.

Monday, April 2, 2007

great quote

"If you want to know your past - look into your present conditions. If you want to know your future - look into your present actions."

~Chinese Proverb~